And so I’ve turned the big 40. Yup. It’s here. I can’t run from it – no one can. It just comes after you like Captain Hook’s Crocodile, forever ticking its way closer. I have to choose where my next chapter in life should lead. I mean, this is the big one: 40.
Forty years of life. This is where one looks back and reflects on his life: regrets, achievements, mistakes, and successes. At least, that’s what I have been thinking about lately. I can’t speak for all men.
Someone recently told me 40 is the new 30. But, let’s face it people, it’s not 30 and it will never be. I’m content with where I am today. Compared to where I was in my late 20s/early 30s – which I refer to as my ‘lost’ period, because I was all over the place, mentally, trying to figure out where I was, who I was and what’s out there. That was the period that 3 different tarot card readers (at different moments) had implied I would be dead at 35. Fortunately, that did not happen and I was able to celebrate my ’35-I’m-Alive’ moment. I met a lot of new people during this period. And sifted through the crowds to continuously find my place. I still don’t know if I ever found it, but I embrace the experiences, none the less.
And in regards to that Crocodile: For the past few years I have been feeling him lurking about, reminding me that he exists. Reminding me to look at my life and ask myself, would I be happy when that Crocodile finds me? Well he’s here and for the most part, I can’t complain about the past 40 years. I mean, I lived a pretty good life: exploring different cultures, worked with many influential people, including celebrities, and just taking the time to smell the flowers. But, of course, there’s more that I want to do and will set out to do for the next 40 or whatever many years I will have left. Yes, Yes, I guess I do have a bucket list and, fortunately, I’ve been mentally ticking it off as the years go by.
So, no, 40 is not the new 30, and the Crocodile is here. I’m feeling that “Forty-over-the-hill” feeling – well, it’s more like I’m at a crossroads or threshold to accept full adulthood. No more teetering on youth. I choose to embrace the crocodile and mature, like a man. To embrace that distinguished aura I will have at 40 plus. That’s part of being 40, correct? To embrace that knowledge and wisdom I am able to share with younglings looking for advice. Yes, I embrace my mature, handsome good looks and charming personality, of course – move over George Clooney.
Also, isn’t this that period in life when I should be purchasing a red sports car and fill it with young vibrant blondes in bikinis? I don’t see me doing that but never say never, I suppose. I’ll check back in 10 years and see where I’m at.
In the meantime, I thank all the people in my life past and present, family, close friends, acquaintances and confidants. What I love most is to laugh; and laugh I shall – even in the face of the Crocodile. At least for right now. I don’t see you Crocodile, but I know you’re here.
Cheers guys! I’ve made it to another year.
Tom says
Nicely written. Happy Birthday Lo. Excited to celebrate with you.